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Why are we making a mountain out of this? The definition: "An inertial
frame is one in which the law of inertia holds" is circular! How do you
know if the law of inertia holds? You have to decide whether a body is
force free. How do you do that? Well if it doesn't accelerate? But then
you are assuming that you are in an inertial frame!
It was clear many decades ago that there is no absolute way to decide
whether you are in an inertial frame.