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A little phsucs humor



This was recently sent to me by a friend in the Philippines. My
apologies if has made the rounds already.

=A New element has been discovered=

"The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered by
physicists. The element, tentatively named Administratum, has no
protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0. However, it
does have: 1 neutron 125 assistant neutrons 75 vice-neutrons 111
assistant vice-neutrons

"This gives it an atomic mass of 312. The 312 particles are held
together by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like
particles called morons.

"Since it has no electrons, Administratum is inert. However, it can be
detected chemically as it impedes every action with which it comes in
contact. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratum
causes one reaction to take four days to complete when it would
normally have occurred in less than one second.

"Administratum has a normal half-life of approximately three years, at
which time it does not actually decay but instead undergoes a
reorganization in which assistant neutrons, vice-neutrons and assistant
vice-neutrons exchange places. Some studies have shown that atomic mass
actually increases after each reorganization.

"Research at other laboratories indicates that Administratum occurs
naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at certain points
such as government agencies, large corporations and universities, and
can usually be found in the newest, best appointed and best maintained
buildings.

"Scientists point out that Administratum is known to be toxic at any
level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reaction
where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine
how Administratum can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but
results to date are not promising."

Chris Humphrey, Ph.D.
Novalis, Saint Paul University Ottawa, Ontario, CANADA

Submited by Ken Kiehlbauch
Faith Academy
Manila, Philippines
(on home leave)