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[yanai@bgumail: whilst on the topic of language ...... (fwd)]



Date: Fri, 21 Jun 1996 14:43:18 +0300 (IDT)
From: Yanai Krutman <yanai@bgumail>
X-Sender: yanai@shikma.bgu.ac.il
To: yanai
Subject: whilst on the topic of language ...... (humor..)
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---------- Forwarded message ----------
Netters,
By morning and sometimes by evening I am a medical physicist.
Here is following a great idea:

Date: Thu, 20 Jun 1996 10:17:00 PDT
From: Huda Walter <hudaw@XRAY.UFL.EDU>
To: Multiple recipients of list MEDPHYS <MEDPHYS@CMS.CC.WAYNE.EDU>
Subject: whilst on the topic of language ......

Having chosen English as the preferred language in the EEC, the European
Parliament has commissioned a feasibility study in ways of improving
efficiency in communications between Government departments.
European officials have often pointed out that English spelling is
unnecessarily difficult; for example: cough, plough, rough, through and
thorough. What is clearly needed is a phased programme of changes to iron
out these anomalies. The programme would, of course, be administered by a
committee staff at top level by participating nations.
In the first year, for example, the committee would suggest using 's'
instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly, sivil servants in all sities would
resieve this news with joy. Then the hard 'c' could be replaced by 'k'
sinse both letters are pronounsed alike. Not only would this klear up
konfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but typewriters kould be made
with one less letter.
There would be growing enthusiasm when in the sekond year, it was announsed
that the troublesome 'ph' would henseforth be written 'f'. This would make
words like 'fotograf' twenty persent shorter in print.
In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible. Governments
would enkourage the removal of double leters whish have always been a
deterent to akurate speling. We would al agre that the horible mes of silent
'e's in the languag is disgrasful. Therefor we kould drop them and kontinu
to read and writ as though nothing had hapend.
By this tim it would be four years sins the skem began and peopl would be
reseptiv to steps sutsh as replasing 'th' by 'z'. Perhaps zen ze funktion
of 'w' kould be taken on by 'v', vitsh is, after al, half a 'w'. Shortly
after zis, ze unesesary 'o kould be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou'.
Similar arguments vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
Kontinuing zis proses yer after yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensibl
riten styl. After tventi yers zer vud be no mor trubls, difikultis and
evrivun vud find it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drems of ze Guvermnt vud
finali hav kum tru.


W (who didn't write this .....)



have a Ph(f)un day..

Yanai

--
Yanai Krutman
Senior Medical Physicist
Radiological Physics and Engineering
Ben-Gurion University of the Negev Kupat Holim Klalit Health Services
Faculty of Engineering Soroka Medical Center
Nuclear Engineering Department Institute of Oncology
POB 653 POB 151
Be'er Sheva 84105 Be'er Sheva 84101
ISRAEL ISRAEL
email: yanai@prism.bgu.ac.il phone: 972-7-400682
yanai@bgumail.bgu.ac.il fax : 972-7-232336